This weekend I went home to see my 21-year-old cousin get married to the love of her life. It was a beautiful wedding and a really fun reception, and I’m so glad I could be there for their big day. But during the brief 22.5 hours I spent in Texas for the wedding I came to the realization that while as my cousin tweeted, “today is the day I’ve been waiting most of my life for,” that day isn’t the day I’m waiting for at this point in my life. And more importantly, I realized it’s totally okay for me to feel that way.

Sure, someday I want a beautiful, laid-back outdoor wedding with only our families and closest friends where I’ll be wearing a flowing (or maybe form-fitting because I have a killer bod, who knows) sweetheart dress and my groom will be in a comfy suit (if there’s even such a thing) and we’ll dance to Chris Brown’s “Forever” (yes, I’m serious) and live happily-ever-after. But for now, that day isn’t what I’m longing for. And again, that is totally okay.

I feel like society, especially Southern society, often tells us that life should go like this: get a “Mrs. Degree” from XYZ University where you’ll meet and fall in love with your future husband, graduate, get married right away, pop out babies, raise kids for 18 years, THEN enjoy life. Umm, what?

For now, I am way too busy already enjoying life and living for the experiences and taking advantage of every opportunity that comes my way. Opportunities that I realize I wouldn’t have been able to jump at if I were married and popping out babies. I am way too busy figuring myself out and growing as an individual who just isn’t ready or even desiring that marriage step yet. Plus, I might need a boyfriend before the thought of marriage is even allowed to think about entering my mind… oh, the tiny details.

Don’t get me wrong, though, for some post-graduates marriage is what’s meant for them. And what do you know?! That’s okay, too. All I’m saying is as someone who has been close to marriage before post-grad life, which killed my relationship, I feel like I can see the whole picture and realize that not being married right out of college was the best thing that could have happened to me. As they teach you in kindergarten, everyone is different… and just because you don’t get married right after college, whether you want to or not, doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you. Post-grad life just has a little bit more single life for you to live, seize and enjoy.